Pastor's Kids are different from all other kid,s although many of them do not know this! This difference is not just because of their father's "calling". It is because of their silent, but very unique and visible "calling". Whether pre-teen, teen, youth or adult, all Pastors' Kids have this one thing in common; they have the call of God upon their lives.

If you are a P.K., whether you are conscious of it or not, you have a distinct and irreplaceable "calling". Your father is not in the ministry alone; you are in it as well. The moment God called your father to be a pastor or a minister of the gospel, He automatically called you into His fold at the same instance, not necessarily to be a pastor or officiate in any of the five-fold ministries, but to be a Preacher's Kid.
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Some "callings" are direct while some are indirect. Your father's "calling" is a direct one. He would need to hear God call him, accept the call, and intentionally decide to act on the call before he is referred to as a pastor. However, yours is an indirect one. Your "calling" does not have to go through the same process as your father's. God does not need to call you individually; so you need not hear His voice when He calls. You are not even given the opportunity to decide whether you want to accept the call or not.

Your own "calling" is directly linked to your father's calling, and whether you like it or not, the moment either of your parents accepts the call of God on their lives, you are left with no choice but to accept yours too. You automatically become a Preacher's Kid. It is not your choice; you do not get enrolled or sign up for it. Your consent is not needed; you just become one, just like that!

To help you further understand that this is a "calling" on its own, see it in this light; none of your friends can wake up tomorrow and decide to address himself as a P.K. if his father is not a preacher. He has to be called into this very unique but grossly unacknowledged ministry by being born into a minister's family. "And no man taketh this honour unto himself, but he that is called of God, as was Aaron". Heb 5:4

If you are lucky enough to be counted worthy to be called into this ministry, you should appreciate it and praise God for this though silent, yet significant calling upon your life. It is a rare privilege. Although, just like every other call, it has its own challenges too, but that does not make it any less than a true and genuine call.

However, with this unique ministry, you will need to be careful about how you live, so that both your actions and your reactions, whether impromptu or premeditated, will not be misconstrued so your life will bring glory to the name of the Caller.

"Wherefore also we pray always for you, that our God would count you worthy of this calling, and fulfill all the good pleasure of his goodness, and the work of faith with power: That the name of our Lord Jesus Christ may be glorified in you, and ye in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ". 2Th 1:11-12


For the purpose of this book, we will classify all Pastors' Kids into four main groups.

1. The Lukewarm Preacher's Kid

The first group is the Lukewarm Preacher's Kid. He is always in church quite alright, but he is not really excited about the church or anything related to it. He is indifferent to his father's religious activities, devotion or commitment and does not take part in church activities as much as the father or other members of the church would expect him to. Unless he is introduced, no one really knows he is the Preacher's Kid.

He is easy going, neither foment troubles nor causes his preacher-parents heartaches, but he equally has little or nothing to do with the ministry, not to mention assisting his father in his vigorous church activities. He is neither hot nor cold. He really may not live a wayward life, and may also be good in his chosen field of endeavor, but he does not meet up with the spiritual expectations of the people around him as a Pastor's Kid.

2. The Worldly Preacher's Kid

This Preacher's Kid is worldly in all his ways. His way of life completely negates what his father stands for. He is constantly a pain in the neck, both of the family and the church. He dresses in a worldly way, talks in a worldly way, behaves so much like a son of Belial or daughter of Jezebel. Even some members of his father's church believe that children of chronic unbelievers are better off than he is.

Although, no one can claim to have caught him red-handed engaging in the works of iniquity or have been able to pin him down to any particular sin, but a very sensitive mind will perceive worldliness and immoralities all around him. He is filled with every appearance of evil.

To make matters worse, this group of Pastor's Kids never stay outside the confines of their parents' homes. They are always in church, and are constantly engaging in things that make members cast aspersions on their parents and their "callings". Deep in their hearts, some ministers who have such kids secretly wish that they either die or go far away from the church to a distant land where no one would be able to discover that they are related in any way.

3. The Lost Preacher's Kid

This, just like the previous group, is also a pain in the neck. The only difference is that this one, in particular, is no longer in the church. He has gone away, not only from the father's home or congregation, but also from the heavenly Father's safe haven. He has lost the faith completely.

While the Worldly Preacher's Kid still tries to portray some level of respect for spiritual matters and still hides his sins without making it obvious to people who can crucify him, the Lost Preacher's Kid can no longer be referred to as a believer in any sense of the word. He does not just toy with sin alone, he lives with it, and does not give a damn who is aware of his ungodly lifestyle.

There is a sharp divide between the Preacher's Kid whom his preacher-parents intended to raise and the one they actually found they have raised. There is a complete deviation from the personality of the two, and it seems it is too late to make any visible and impactful amendment.

As though to continually remain a pain in the neck of his preacher-parents, he still answers his father's famous surname, as a way of getting cheap popularity from the people. This action, in turn, opens up the father's ministry to more slanders from the people, most of whom have never and may never meet the father in their lifetime, but will continually blame the father for the life his lost kid has chosen, and will evaluate the success of the father's ministry based on his supposed failure at parenting.

4. The Ideal Preacher's Kid

This is the ideal Preacher's Kid. He is responsible and cool-headed. He responds well to the Christian training he has received from home. He lives a spiritually balanced, academically sound and morally stable life, either publicly or privately, and as such is well respected by every member of the church.

He is an example of good behavior to all the other teenagers and youths in the church. Although, due to immaturity, age, and youthful exuberance, he may have his own shortcomings once in a while, but in general, you cannot help but love him for being a good representative of his father everywhere he is found. In school, at home, in the office, in church, or where ever, he is just the toast of every parent; such that all parents in church secretly wish to have him as a son. They keep encouraging their children to become his friend in order to learn his godly manners so they can behave exactly like him.

The purpose of this book, to an extent, is to make every Preacher's Kid who will read it become, if not the Ideal Preacher's Kid, but at least, something very close to it. And to help every preacher who will read this book so that they can be graced to raise all their kids as one.


Out of the four categories discussed above, whichever category you find yourself in as a Preacher's Kid, you will always have people around you, or better put, you will find yourself in the midst of the crowd so often that you may almost be lost in the crowd. These crowds can be grouped into seven different classes of people. The extent of success or failure you record as a Pastor's Kid will be determined by the amount of time you spend with each of them.

1. The Sycophants

Your life and your identity as a Preacher's Kid will attract a whole lot of sycophants to your life. These are people who are only around you to take advantage of your privileged position in church. Their relationship with you is basically because of the benefits they enjoy by being a friend of the Pastor's son or daughter, especially if your father pastors a large and wealthy church, and is highly influential in your immediate community or beyond.

They are bootlickers who just want to "feel among", be identified with the main family in church, and accorded the same respect and honor that a Preacher's Kid gets. You will be very lucky if the sycophants you have around you are only interested in what they get from you, and do not mislead you to do things contrary to God's principles. Sycophants are flatterers who cannot be depended on for the best of wise counsels. This is because whatever advice they give, most of the time is coated with their own selfish desires.

Prince Rehoboam, the son of King Solomon, after ascending the throne at the demise of his father, took counsel from the sycophants around him on how to govern the people. The advice he received got him into trouble. So, be careful of the sycophants around you.

2. The Care-Givers

There will be people around you whose love you really do not deserve, but they still show you tender love and care any way, any day, any time. Whatever love they show to you is a reflection of their love for your preacher-parents, or a bid to repay whatever blessings, physical or spiritual, they have received from your parents.

They can be best described as King David to your Mephiboseth. Mephy, as his name would have been shortened if he lived in our age, was not qualified to be near the palace, but the King's relationship with his father, Prince Jonathan, got him a privileged seat on the king's dining table long after his father's death, without his lobbying for it. The only difference is that these caregivers will not wait until your father dies before they start showing their love to you. However, you must be careful not to take advantage of them.

3. The True Lovers

Besides those who will show love to you for your father's sake, there will also be people who will genuinely love you for who you are. To them, it makes no difference whether you are the Preacher's Kid or not; it neither encourages nor discourages their closeness to you.

Their affiliation to you is irrespective of your 'pastoral child status'. They would not have loved you less if you were not a Preacher's Kid, neither did they love you more because you are one. They just love you because you are you; no strings attached. And as long as you keep being you, they will keep loving you.

They may be older than you are, they may be younger than you are, and they may be your agemates, but irrespective of their age, their souls will be closely knitted with yours. This can be likened to the way Prince Jonathan Saul fell in love with David Jesse, a poor shepherd boy who was employed to play the harp in the palace for peanuts. Jonathan and David would represent kids from the upper class and lower class of our society today, but their undying love for each other was not based

on any material wealth or position. It was a genuine one.

Please note that the fact that you are known by everybody does not mean you are actually loved by everybody. You are really loved by just a few. You also will have these few people around you who will show you genuine love. Please, do not betray their love.

4. The Avengers

You cannot help it; you will be criticized for your father's sins. There are people who do not love your father, and some of them may not hide it. Worst still, they will attempt to transfer their annoyance and aggression with your father to you. You will be surprised that there are believers like this!

Some of them may even be council members, respectable members of the church, elders or deacons. It really does not matter the title they have in church, but when they fight, they fight dirty. Some of these ones may not be able to face your father to challenge him about the issues they have with him, but they see you as a good opportunity to vent their anger on your parents. You do not have to do anything to them to deserve their hatred; you earn it simply because your father deserves it!

This is the first group of the haters you will find around you, those who have issues with you because they have issues with your father, and will hold you accountable for your father's sins, causing you to suffer for the same in whatever way they can. They may not open up to you that the reason they do what they do to you is as a result of their frictions with your preacher-parents, but if you are smart enough, you will know.

One nice thing about them is that the moment their issues with your preacher-parents are over, their issues with you come to an end at the same instance. The bad thing about many of them is that those issues do not come to an end as easily as that, one always leads to another.

5. The Haters

Besides the first group of haters called "avengers" who hate you for your father's sins, you will also have people around you who hate you just because you are you. These are people who you can never please, whatever you do. They simply hate you for who you are. Every effort you make to initiate peace with them always ends up backfiring at you.

There is nothing you do that these ones will not find faults with. This is not because what you do in itself is bad, but because they simply hate you, and nothing you can do will change their opinion.

Try all you can to please them so as to convince them to change their opinions about you and begin to see you in a better light and you are just like one trying to convince a dog that meat is better than bone; it is a waste of effort.

If you keep quiet in the Bible study they assume you want to cover up your ignorance about the Bible so they complain that you are too quiet for a Preacher's Kid. If you decide to share from your wealth of experience they accuse you of pride, complaining that you like to show off so that everyone will know that you are the Preacher's Kid. You simply cannot make them like you. Just neglect them and live as God expects you to.

6. The Indifferent

These ones are not really interested in you. To them, you are just an entity, no more, no less. Their relationship with you is purely based on whatever relationship you have with them. They see you more as a classmate, neighbor, coursemate, church mate, or whatever, than a Preacher's Kid, and the relationship is kept purely as that.

They do not care if you are a Preacher's Kid or herbalist's heir as long as it has nothing to do with the relationship they have with you. You may not even be their friend for all they care, but you cannot also be called their enemy. You are just another 'matter' in the universe, you have weight and you occupy space, and you are available for them whenever they need you.

They treat you just like every other person; no preferential dealing because of your appellation of a Preacher's Kid.

7. The Evil Geniuses

Lastly, you will always have around you people who want to influence your life for evil. They are referred to in this book as the evil genius. These ones have only one primary assignment in your life, to cause you to derail from the path of righteousness. They are assigned by the devil to ensure that every child born into a good Christian home ends up as a bad example for Christianity, and their primary target is to start with Pastors' Kids.

They are available all around you; in your school, your office, your neighborhood, your gym, and surprisingly, even in your church. These are the ones the Bible calls wolves in sheep's clothing. They appear much like a friend, but they are enemies in disguise. You will need to be careful around such people. The degree of success you will record as a believer in good standing is in direct proportion to the gap you create between you and these evil geniuses.


These seven groups of people you will always find around you anywhere you find yourself. Your success in life, in whatever field of career you choose to follow, will be determined by how well you manage each of these seven groups of people around you.