Chapter 80 – Gifts From Fatty
Gifts From Fatty
“Thankfully, you did not die. Otherwise, I would be left alone. What would I ever do without you?” Fatty Tang wiped away his tears. After that, he drank a cup of tea that Little Ke brought in and called out. “Come! Quickly lift up and bring over the gifts that my Tang Family has prepared for Third Young Master Jun!”
Jun Moxie turned his attention to the outside, he was curious as to what kind of gifts did this brother of his prepared. He had even used the word “lift” for the gifts, what kind of gifts could it be?
Two men carried in two big boxes into the room, their faces showing an expression of extreme difficulty. Suddenly, Jun Moxie’s bedroom was completely occupied by Tang Yuan and the two big boxes. Even Little Ke did not have any place to be at; she could only try to shrink her legs as she sat on a chair.
Tang Yuan waved to have the two men move out and laughed. He moved about with a mysterious air as he giggled and glanced at Jun Moxie. After opening the box, he moved away to let Jun Moxie see the contents within. Seeing it, Jun Moxie nearly fainted.
Placed within the box were high-grade medicines, boxes after boxes, bottles after bottles, packages after packages… all of them were perfectly packed and the smell of medicine assailed one’s nose. One look was enough to confirm that the things inside were all valuable items. Jun Moxie wondered: did this fatty sweep up all the medical shops within the capital?
For the common people that had been injured, these medicines would certainly prove useful. In fact, those medicines were necessary. Moreover, some of these medicines might be impossible to obtain even if one has money. However, there was a problem here… Jun Moxie is no ordinary person; he has absolutely no need for this stuff!
In Jun Moxie’s eyes, these items were no different from a pile of garbage! At the very least, it was only chicken ribs*!
Groaning, Jun Moxie spoke feebly. “Fatty, you have had it tough. However, even if I were to get hurt every day, all these medicines could probably last until the day I reach a hundred years of age. Are you here to visit me, or to curse me so that I get injured more?”
Tang Yuan slapped down on the box, closing it and spoke in a triumphant demeanour. “Third Young Master, what do you think of your brother’s acquisition techniques? As long as the medicine is available in Tianxiang City, regardless if it is the holy grade or pinnacle grade, all of it is now within these two boxes!” After saying that, he secretly moved close to Jun Moxie and whispered furtively. “Third Young Master, those in the bottom layer are the ones I have spent a huge amount of effort in acquiring. Those are all rare items that are very hard to find. You must hide them carefully.”
“What is it?” Jun Moxie felt himself becoming interested; his eyebrows were raised as he asked.
Tang Yuan gave a furtive glance at Little Ke and then smiled indecently before replying. “The ones at the bottom are those that you are most interested in, treasures to make females strong, Joysong Grass, Kinky Lady, Chaste Breaker, Golden Spirit Spear, Infallible Rod, Wall Piercer, Hundred Jin Hoist…
“Stop! Stopstopstop!” Jun Moxie was shocked. “What in the world are all those weird stuffs? What is that… Hundred Jin Hoist, just what is that?”
“Hundred Jin Hoist, hehehe…” Tang Yuan let out an obscene smile again. Pointing at Jun Moxie’s crotch, he whispered. “It means that after you eat that item, then that part of you could hoist up a hundred jin (60.5 kg)… err, good stuff!” Hearing Jun Moxie use the words ‘stuff’, Tang Yuan decided to call it ‘stuff’ as well.
“Bloody Hell! Don’t do this to me, that is simply too disgusting!” Jun Moxie felt himself coming down with a headache. “Quickly move it away! If my grandfather sees it, he might decide to just cut that part of mine off! I want to take it with me even after I die! Don’t bring such a kind of calamity to me!”
“What are you scared of? As long as one is a man, he will certainly appreciate this item! If I am not mistaken, Senior Boss Jun should also have this item. After all, his age is nothing to scoff at. Without the help of this ‘stuff’, even with his glorious bearing, he may not be able… kaka…” Tang Yuan laughed out recklessly. Suddenly…
“What item do I also have?” A deep, profound voice sounded out and Grandpa Jun stepped into view just outside the doors. A puzzled expression was on his face as he glanced at Tang Yuan before looking at the crammed room. “What is going on here? What were you just talking about earlier?”
Why is my luck so shitty! Tang Yuan was shell-shocked, large drops of sweat perspired out from him, his eyes rolling about in disorder. The floor below his obese body had, in an instant become drenched with a pool of sweat: Oh, my pitiful life! If those words earlier had been heard by Old Master Jun…
“What is all this stuff?” Grandpa Jun showed an expression of annoyance. “What a mess, quickly move it away!”
Tang Yuan immediately straightened himself, nodding his head like a chicken pecking on grains. “Yes, yes! I will immediately take them out! These are all some common herbs and medicine, nothing special about it.”
After he spoke out though, Grandpa Jun spoke out again. “Fatty, what was the item that you said I have?”
The facial features on Tang Yuan’s face suddenly contorted together, his complexion turning white, then red, then green. His fat cheeks trembled non-stop and his thigh quaked…
“Uh, Fatty was saying something about your imposing aura, he even said that His Majesty’s aura could also be felt from you, but decided to stop because the subject was too much of a taboo,” Jun Moxie quickly stepped in to smooth things over. Watching the poor Fatty’s pitiful figure, he estimated that Fatty would probably turn to stone from just another word by Grandpa Jun.
“What is so taboo about that subject? Do you need to be scared to such heights? This senior simply possess a grand and imposing aura, a heroic aura that would never fade, this is simply a fact!” Grandpa Jun looked at Tang Yuan with an expression of disdain and continued. “In the future, do not invite our Moxie to go to those shady places anymore. Back then, he became bad because he followed you all the time.”
“Ah?” Tang Yuan became shocked: Old Master, how could you flip right and wrong to such an extent? Back then, I was the one who followed your grandson and turned bad as a result…
Grandpa Jun snorted. In his heart, his own grandson was naturally a good grandson. As for all the disappointing things which happened back then, the main reason would naturally be due to this bad apple of a friend…
The two bodyguards came in and lifted up the two boxes. Tang Yuan then urgently said. “The second box…”
Jun Moxie started to sweat himself: Could it be that the items within the second box are even more unbearable than the first? Are you trying to get me killed…
Grandpa Jun waved his hand, commanding the men to carry away the two boxes of gifts away. Little Ke also went along with them. It was only then that the two of them let out a sigh of relief.
An old man with white hair and beard walked in; his face was one of kindness and harmony; he carried with him a small medical chest. Tang Yuan became shocked; he quickly bowed in a respectful manner and saluted. “Sir Fang.”
This Sir Fang was none other than the Chief of the Imperial Doctors, Fang Huisheng. Those within Tianxiang City also gave him a resounding nickname: Death Warding Fang! The meaning behind this name was that no matter how grievous one’s injuries may be, once the Imperial Doctor Fang treats that person, then that person will never die! This description towards him may have been exaggerated, however, his expertise within the field of medicine was indeed indisputable. If Huatuo** were to return to life, then he would probably be at this level.
In the past, Tang Yuan had fallen seriously ill and all the doctors within the capital were unable to cure him. During the most critical moment, this Sir Fang had appeared to treat him, saving him from the brink of death. Thus, Tang Yuan showed a great level of respect towards Sir Fang. After all, he was the one who saved his life.
Fang Huisheng nodded and gave a gentle smile. Without speaking, he sat on the bed and his hands grasped onto Jun Moxie’s wrist, feeling the pulse on his wrist. He carefully observed Jun Moxie’s complexion, pulling up his eyelids and asking him to extend his tongue out for observation.
It was at this moment that an idea suddenly popped into Jun Moxie’s mind.
Using his internal energies, he exerted control over the qi flow of his body. It suddenly moved, causing his meridians to pulse in a seemingly abnormal manner.
This method was something that this world has no knowledge of. Naturally, there was also no one who could detect this method.
Fang Huisheng’s face gradually turned serious. He had originally assumed that Jun Zhantian was simply making a mountain out of a molehill by dragging him here. However, after having checked this patient’s pulse, he suddenly realized that this youngster before him was in a truly terrible state!
[* There is a part of chicken ribs which is tasteless. Meaning: Eating it would be pointless; throwing it away would be a waste.]
[** Huatuo is a famed doctor in ancient China during the Three Kingdoms era.]